01 Nov Ask Emilie: New Job Wants Wedding Invites(Last Updated On: 03/11/2018)
Welcome to Ask Emilie, here you can ask any question to our wedding planner Emilie. Emilie will answer your question no matter the topic. It can be about anything from styling, general wedding questions, cultural customs, planning, wedding budget and more. This week we are talking with a bride who new job wants wedding invites.
Today’s question is from Yolanda E who asks:
Hi Emilie I just started this new job like literally two months ago. No one has come out and said it, but my colleagues and even boss have hinted that they should be invited to my wedding. I literally know no one here before I started but like WTF. What do I do as I already have a head count? I really don't want to add to my budget for people I don't really know. They are great and all but seriously! Any advice would be awesome and its a new job and don't want to ruin it. I just don't want to invite like 12 people I am not close to or know!
It’s an interesting situation you are in. Many people feel this way when it comes to their work. However, in your situation, this is a new job, and they are putting pressure on you already?!?! Surely some of your colleagues who have been married, understand the complexities of such an event? No problem we have a few solutions that may come in handy.
New Job Wants Wedding Invites #NoPressure
Invite Colleagues To The Reception Only
There is a way to invite everyone without increasing your headcount and also not adding to your budget. You could invite your colleagues to your ceremony only. This way you can invite everyone from your work. You can clearly state that due to restrictions before you started your job, the venue is at capacity. This way none of your colleagues will be offended, they are invited, and they will not be at your reception.
Only Invite The Boss
Sometimes it feels like weddings are a little like Game Of Thrones due to all the politics. While it may not be ideal, you could make an exception for your boss. This way you minimise the number of people coming to your reception and only invite people who have any influence. (IE those who sign your paycheck).
The great thing about this method is that you can also invite your colleagues to the ceremony while only letting your boss come to reception dinner.
Stand Your Ground
While the colleagues at your new job want wedding invites sometimes you just need to say no. They may be lovely people, but this is YOUR (and your future partners) wedding. If any of them have either been married or been involved in help planning/organising, they should realise how much goes into it. It is such an involved process that we even created a wedding planning advice series vlog to help guide you through the process.
They should also realise its not an ‘open invite’ where everyone is welcome. If you genuinely do not want your work colleagues at your wedding, be polite and say it cannot be done. Naturally, do not burn any bridges but be firm on your decision. Who cares if your new job wants wedding invites as it is your wedding, not theirs. I doubt they would be so open with invites if it were their wedding.
One Last Thing To Consider
It is entirely possible that they keep saying that they want to ‘be invited’ to the wedding, but it could be a running joke that has gotten out of control. Sometimes things that start as a simple joke can spiral out of control. By them saying it constantly, it’s giving you the impression that they definitely want to go. You could always speak to one of your colleagues in private and ask if they are serious (in a nice way). Ongoing jokes are just that and need to be squashed early on.
Its Your Wedding
While obviously, you should do whatever you want as it’s your wedding. It should not matter if your new job wants wedding invites. While not an ideal situation I hope the above ideas have given you additional avenues.
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Would you invite people you only met recently to your wedding day? Did your job ever pressure you to be invited? Let us know and join the discussion, leave a comment below 🙂